The reason some people don’t allow themselves to laugh and enjoy their lives when times are tough is because they feel guilty or they feel they don’t have the right. They say, “How can I find the laughter in my life when I was just diagnosed with cancer?” Well, that’s when you’re supposed to. They say, “How can you expect me to laugh and enjoy my life when the economy is falling apart and I may lose my job at any time?” Well my friend, that’s when you’re supposed to. It is essential that we all understand that there is a difference between laughing at something that is serious and laughing off the fear it represents. I believe that’s the number one reason why we are given the gift of laughter: To laugh in the face of fear. When you do, perception changes, negativity shifts and fear is kept at bay. I want to make this point as clear as I possibly can. Are you ready? When times are tough, even severe, we must at some point find the courage within ourselves to laugh off the fear.

I was in total awe at the energy this guy radiated. He told a few jokes, thanked the audience for supporting comedy, and stepped off the stage. People were begging him for his autograph. Some simply wanted to touch him and thank him. Then everyone started chanting that he was number one. I said to myself, “So that’s what it’s like to be a star.”

Later that night when the crowd was gone and the staff was cleaning up, I sat at the bar with Rodney. I asked him how it felt to be at the top. He downed a double scotch and said, “It sucks.” I laughed and waited for a punch line. Then it became obvious that he was serious. He proceeded to go on a verbal rampage on how he was cheated in life and that the entertainment business never gave him the respect he deserved, an eerie echo of the catchphrase that made him famous to begin with. “Look at me!” he said angrily. “They waited until my later years before they decided I was a star! I should have made it twenty or thirty years ago when I was young and I could have enjoyed it!”

I was dumbfounded. This was when Rodney’s iconic performance in Back To School was currently showing in theaters, which Rodney starred in and co-wrote. I searched for the right words and finally said, “But you’re at the top of your career. You’re a household name. Everyone knows who you are. Didn’t you hear that crowd? They love you and know your jokes by heart. You have a blockbuster movie that’s getting great reviews. Leonard Maltin gave you a nine!”

He downed another drink and said, “It should have been a ten! All those years of busting my ass and taking shit from people who have no idea what talent is! I gave up everything for this damn business and for what?” He shook his head in disgust and looked straight into my eyes. “I don’t expect you to understand, Steve.” He looked down into his empty glass. “It should have happened years ago when I was younger. I really could have enjoyed myself.”

This is a truly sad story. Here was someone who should have been living his dream. Instead, he was living a nightmare. He achieved far more than he set out to do, but he could not enjoy the benefits of his success. Why, because for most of his life, he waited for a future event to make him happy. Many years ago he created a belief system that signified that he couldn’t and wouldn’t be happy until he achieved a certain status in life. As a result, he bypassed the journey towards the goal and let his life pass him by. His past had taken over his present, daily reality, and he was haunted by regrets of days gone by.

People who view their lives as Rodney did quite often get caught up in a perpetual cycle of unconscious thoughts that lead them to believe that success and happiness is somewhere in the future or when the goal is achieved. The unfortunate truth about people with this type of mindset is that no matter what they achieve, they will have a difficult time being happy. As long as they go through life consumed with negative emotions and unaware that they are identifying their success and happiness with a distant goal, nothing will satisfy them, even when that goal is achieved.

Trust me when I say there are always more bills to pay and something expensive to repair around the house. Unexpected setbacks will occur and new work projects will quickly replace the ones that are currently stressing you out. Statements that focus on what you lack in the present, or predicate happiness on a future event, destroy your chance of enjoying the moment.

The good news is there are always fresh opportunities to be happy. Imagine life is like Grand Central Station where happy times arrive around the clock. The chances are the opportunity to be happy has already arrived. Sometimes it’s right in front of you. For whatever reason, you’re focusing on your lack or you’re fixated on what isn’t working in your life and you are unable to shift your focus to notice and appreciate it. Regardless of what is happening to you, or going on around you, you can feel happier, you can be productive, attract success, and enjoy yourself during the process. When you gradually shift your focus towards what you have and what you are grateful for, your perspective changes. In other words dear reader; when shift happens, your life changes. So get your shift together.

Maybe we should consider a more realistic interpretation of what it means to be positive. Being positive isn’t always a Disney movie. I have learned that being positive isn’t always about feeling good. Oddly, it’s healthy to feel bad sometimes. It means you’re not a robot. And being positive doesn’t mean we never make mistakes. True positivism knows that we learn from our mistakes and allows us to move forward with optimism that we are better people for having made them, richer, deeper and more resilient than before. Being positive doesn’t mean that we are always smiling and enjoying every moment of our lives. Give me a break! It’s realizing that sometimes it’s okay to cry, mourn, and feel sad. It’s not about being in control of your emotions. Hey, it’s okay to sometimes get angry and lose your temper. Don’t worry; your positivity license won’t be revoked.

People who are generally positive have problems just like everyone else. What separates the chronically positive from everyone else is that they know that their problems won’t last for ever and are simply part of the process of life. Positive people are the ultimate shift-heads. That is to say, they find a way to shift their perspective and hold on to the things that bring them joy. This is a quality that keeps them from feeling victimized. Pain is unavoidable, but to a person with a positive attitude, that’s all it is: pain that is not uncompounded by doubt and comparisons to past experience.

Positive people instinctively know that adversity is necessary in order to grow. We are here on Earth to experience, learn, grow and become the person we are meant to be. I can’t stress enough that the filter through which we view our experiences, ultimately determines who we become. How we choose to experience what happens to us, be it good or bad, will determine what we learn. What we learn determines how we grow, and this continued growth is what shapes who and what we become. If we can comprehend this, it will help free us from feeling victimized when times are tough, and just maybe help us to compare a challenging situation to a pop quiz in Life:101, rather than, say, the apocalypse.

Remember, the only losers in the game of life are those who, for whatever reason, fail to use their challenges as a springboard for growth. This is where the power of Shifting can help you tremendously.
So are you ready to get your shift together? If not, than you better shift and get off the pot, because when shift happens, your life changes.
At this point you’ve probably had enough of my shift.
I guess you can say I’m full of shift.
I apologize; sometimes I’m just a real shift-head.
Oh shift, I did it again!
Seriously folks: May the Shift be with you!!!

The above lyrics are from a song called “The Dance,” sung by Garth Brooks. This song simply and beautifully states that it’s not the outcome or what happens to us that validates our lives, but rather; it’s what we do and how we feel along the way that gives our lives meaning. We will never know who we are or what splendor life has to offer unless we jump in and participate in the dance. Yes, you may be entering unknown territory, but that’s where the adventure is. You may be on top one day and suddenly fall the next but think about this. Isn’t it better to fall than not to try at all?

We can strategically plan our lives, make careful use of our choices and take what we think are the appropriate actions to fulfill the ideal life we want, but there is absolutely no way of knowing with certainty what will happen. There are just too many variables and unexpected twists and turns that come into play. There is no sure way of knowing how our lives will wind up. Well guess what? We’re not supposed to. If we did, the thrill of life would cease to exist.

As John Lennon said, “Life is what happens while you are busy making other plans.” Ironically, as you know the unexpected did happen to him. After years of isolation from fame and the music business, John Lennon got his life together and came out of seclusion. He was making a huge comeback when he was suddenly killed by a crazed fan. This happened within weeks after his new album – ironically entitled – “Starting Over” – hit the top of the charts.

I can’t help but wonder; what if John Lennon somehow knew that his life would be taken by an assassin’s bullet? How would he have lived the rest of his life? Would he have come out of seclusion and into limelight again? Or would he have stopped dancing to the song in his heart and suppressed his potential, his creativity, his soul and the very essence of who he was?

Our lives are better in chance simply because if we knew the outcome we would be tempted to override the gifts of choice and free will. (No, not Free Willy. Free will.) If we altered our lives because we knew of our fate beforehand we would never know our true potential. Our experiences would be limited for fear of moving forward.

If we possessed the magical power to see into the future and know the outcome of a particular road we chose to follow, our lives would be boring – to say the least. We would be unchallenged to discover our essence. We would be robbing ourselves of the events that cause us to grow. It is the combination of our victories, successes, and happy moments – as well as our disappointments, failures and heartaches that make up the ingredients to the recipe of our lives. It’s in the not-knowing – the uncertainty that makes our lives worthwhile.

Awhile back I was watching The Super Bowl at a hotel I was staying at. There were well over 100 people in the lounge area. Everyone was yelling and cheering for their team to win. It was an incredibly close game. Every time a team scored or made a great play, fans would jump out of their seats and cheer them on. It was obvious that everyone was excited and enjoying themselves. But that excitement and enjoyment was coming from the anticipation of not knowing which team was going to prove to be victorious.

My question to you, dear reader, is this – what would be the point in watching The Super Bowl or any other sporting event if we knew beforehand which team would win? Who could deny that it’s in the not-knowing that makes it exciting?

It’s the same with our lives which has often been referred to as a game. Unlike any other game however; the goal in the game of life is not to win or to be the best, but rather it’s to follow our hearts and to experience, learn, grow and become.